The need to be perfect is like trying to fit everything into a perfect tiny little box, tied with a perfect pretty bow on the outside.
Ever since I can remember, I have had a NEED to be perfect.
Growing up, like many people, I was programmed to live into the rat race lifestyle. And I believed that mistakes meant failure, and anything less than an A grade meant I wasn’t doing my best. I was the ‘perfect’ child and I had this insatiable need to be the best at dance, at school, at anything and everything. It was the running theme of my life.
And trying to be perfect rewarded me a lot over the years, but I realised that the rewards didn’t fill my soul. In fact, trying to be perfect meant that I was so busy playing someone else’s game, that I had no idea what I wanted. Trying to be perfect stopped me from quitting my Corporate job because if I didn’t earn my salary each month and fulfill what was expected of me, then I would be a failure.
The more I look around me and in society today, I realise that this need to be perfect is like a disease.
Trying to be perfect steals my joy, and my authenticity and robs me of my inner truth.
My mind was programmed to believe that: Not being perfect = I am a failure.
But I KNOW that perfection is an impossible standard. So, therefore, I am constantly a failureβ¦that, my friends, is an exhausting existence. And more importantly, THAT IS A LIE.
In Jan 2020, I decided that I was done being a perfectionist. I quit my job and started my own coaching business, Shape Coaching. And it has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. I have had to work on my mindset every day and call myself out when I’m feeding my disease of perfectionism. And I have made countless mistakes. So many, but here are a few we can all laugh at together:
- I have launched coaching programmes and no one bought them
- I did a live once where no one attended
- I have had more than 50 no’s from potential clients
- It took me 8 months to launch my website
And guess what?
I’m still here. And now, I am fulfilled.
I wake up every day so excited to speak to my clients and meet new inspiring women.
I have created a 6 figure business doing what I love.
I mess up.
I learn.
I mess up again.
I learn some more.
And I am witnessing the most incredible women release their need to be perfect and they are showing up in all their true power.
I’ve realised that:
- Failure is my friend – I WILL fail along the way. That is the ONLY path to success, growth and mastery.
- Every time I get a no from a potential client, I take a deep breath and smile, because I know I’m one step closer to a yes and I ALWAYS learn something from the person or the experience with them. Who knows, they might be back one day.
- Being a perfectionist is exhausting! And it stifles my truth, it stops the real me, my inner true voice from being heard and makes me play small.
- Messing up often makes for a funny story on the other side of itβ¦most of the time π
- Accepting that I can’t be perfect means that I will be more productive and take action.
- Playing big makes you a leader. Being a perfectionist keeps you small.
